5 Core Pillars of Holistic Self Improvement
Brief and concise introduction to holistic self improvement.
Holistic self-improvement. This is a general term, buzzword but what are the actual parts that make the thing holistic? What does it even mean?
The word “holistic” comes from the Greek word holos, meaning "whole" or "entire." Whichever opinion you take on this, it will differ. No wonder, it’s a broad and deep term. These are the five key areas I see as crucial—five aspects of life to develop in harmony. All 5 pillars merge with themselves and create a whole.
“Who is blessed? He who has a healthy body, a resourceful mind and a teachable nature.”
1. Mental
If you are not a newbie here you know that mental health is not even step 1, it’s step 0. Good hardware with bad software is equally bad as good software with bad hardware.
Your mental health shapes your productivity (how much you get done), creativity (how you solve problems), discipline (how you stick to goals), and motivation (why you even bother trying). Before you fix anything else, fix this.
It’s the lens through which you see the world. When that lens is foggy, everything feels harder.
This is the most crucial pillar to address. Mental health is step 0—I can confidently say that’s one of the “root beliefs” of All Things Self Improvement.
It’s the anchor that determines whether you drift or hold firm when life’s storms hit. A lot to say here. Fortunately, I happen to have a whole book about this.
2. Physical
The ancient Greeks had it right—a sound mind in a sound body.
About lifestyle and addictions—you already know what you have to do. I'm not going to give you a magic trick to quit smoking here, but you can skim the publication for resources helpful in changing habits.
Changing your mind to not rely on unhealthy food, substances and behaviors is a long and complex process. It’s achievable, but don’t expect to wake up as a 100% health Bryan Johnson type of freak when the day before you were fat and groggy.
Slowly and thoughtfully, but take action.
Identify and accept the problems. Admit to yourself that daily vaping is, in fact, a health problem.
Educate yourself. Pick up a book about the topic, listen to a podcast while you drive, follow relevant accounts, unfollow those with bad influence. Make your digital environment support you.
Test and adjust.
Repeat.
About physical activity—I would distinguish 2 main categories here:
Bodybuilding: can become a lifelong passion, satisfying, you actually look like someone who takes care of their body, very simple fundamentals but a lot of rabbit holes to dive into, sometimes hard to sustain.
Any form of cardio: low entry barrier, likable—many forms of cardio are satisfying because of being literal games, a lot of options to choose from. Simple treadmill is enough.
And by the way, creating a simple home gym is pretty easy and not that expensive. Sooner or later, I will make a guide about it.
3. Relationships
The source of most happiness and pain.
The last of the 3, which form the core of the core. Easier to focus on 4 and 5 when those 3 are taken care of first.
I believe strong relationships are essential for happiness. I also believe relationships can cause the most chaos from all of the 5 pillars as you have the least control here.
I’m not talking only about romantic relationships here. It’s annoying how “relationships” make people automatically think “romantic relationships”.
Anyway, here are a few important points related to relationships, no particular order, both questions and statements:
If you're doing the right thing and the other person can't show even a minimum of goodwill, don’t try to change them—walk away.
If you feel like a relationship will end up bad for you, it most likely will.
Do you need the person or what the person gives you?
You will never be objective about relationships in your life.
Conflicts are the best test of both your and other person’s social and “human” skills.
We are not saints—it happens to do something morally bad. But bad behaviors with no reason behind them are a huge red flag.
Get your shit together before you ever think of fixing someone else. Pro tip: don’t, don’t try to fix. You are not responsible for other people’s bad choices. If they blame you for that, that’s a huge red flag.
Avoid energy vampires. Some people are just very annoying to be around. I met with a girl a few days ago. Stunning, truly one of the prettiest girls I have ever seen. But man, at the end of the meeting I just wanted to drive her home and enjoy my peace and silence. If you suspect you may be one of those people, read “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie.
There are a ton of things to say and personal lessons to share here, but that’s not for today. The crucial skill here is identifying which relationship, and when, starts to become bad for you. Other people can help with that by giving you their perspective but it won’t do anything if you have absolutely no skill and will to change the current state.
4. Purpose
“If a man knows not to which port he sails, no wind is favorable.” ― Seneca the Younger
Life doesn’t have a default purpose. It has ones assigned to you by society, but if you are not satisfied with those, you need to find it on your own.
That’s quite a challenge because nobody knows what you want, not even you (at least until you find it).
How to find your purpose then?
That’s not a question I can answer, but I can tell you a few things to keep in mind while you are on a hunt for it.
Your best shot is trying various things. Filter what you do and don’t like, repeat until you find something you are satisfied with.
It doesn’t have to be something majestic.
If that’s the first thing you think about after waking up and last before falling asleep, you are on a good path.
If doing crack is the first thing you think about after waking up and last before falling asleep, you are not on a good path.
Don't make your purpose about another person.
It’s a process of self-reflection and refinement.
5. Financial
Don’t demonize it. It’s hard to improve any of the above when you are starving.
There’s not a single problem (excluding some absurd hypothetical situations created just to disprove this point) where money doesn’t, directly or indirectly, help.
Seriously, try to think of something and write it in the comments.
Having money you can afford mental health specialists and expensive medications.
Having money you can hire a personal trainer, a nutritionist, go for regular checkups, hire a chef to prepare healthy meals for you, the list goes on.
Having money you can enjoy more fun and bonding activities together.
Having money you can focus entirely on finding your purpose.
Having money you can insanely speed up progress in any other area of life. It’s like a cheat code. You spend five years building an organic following, and someone surpasses your numbers in a month by dumping $1000000 on ads.
That’s why I included the financial aspect as the 5th pillar. Money is a key that opens many doors. Money can take the pressure off your head. Money can take away anxiety about the future.
If you are one of those people who demonize money, capitalism, and entrepreneurship—change your mind for your own well-being.